Ramblings

This morning I walked the vineyards near my house, as I often do. Because I was alone, I decided to use it as a time of prayer. I spent a good amount of time praying for people that I know, for the salvation of various family members, and for my own spiritual growth. I spent time praising God for the many blessings in my life and the beauty of the world before me as I plodded along the gravel roads. And then I prayed that the internal voice inside my head would turn off for awhile so that I could just listen. I probably asked about a dozen different ways because, not surprisingly, the voice wouldn't cease. I asked that God would keep me from day dreaming or getting distracted by everything around me. Then, in my head, I started singing "Oh Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth...". For the life of me, I couldn't stop the constant internal chatter. I don't know how to listen to my Maker; I only know how to praise Him and how to make requests. I wasn't waiting for the voice inside my head to switch from my voice to the voice of, say, Andy Rooney, but I was hoping for something.

As I continued on my walk, feeling the wind rush against my face and seeing more weeds, trees, and flowers that I could count, I started thinking about the time I spent working at Alden Lane (a local plant nursery). I loved the physical work; being scratched by hundreds of boxed roses as I maneuvered around them, filling their containers with life-sustaining water. Feeling the gravel crunch under my shoes. Collapsing into bed with sore muscles and exhausted feet. I loved the feeling of purpose; of using my body to serve. I couldn't take credit for the beauty of the plants I maintained, but I was able to find enjoyment in knowing that I had helped sustain them. It's a lot like teaching in that aspect; I can't take credit for the lives that come into my classroom - they belong entirely to the Lord. But I can serve them and watch them grow and find enjoyment in knowing that I've played a part in shaping them and serving them. Cheesy as they may be, those are the thoughts I ended with on my walk.